A bride in a white wedding dress and a groom in a blue suit sit at a bar, with the groom resting his head on the bride's shoulder, both looking tired or reflective. the bar is stocked with various bottles and drinks.


Ultimately, the answer to this question is a big fat no.  Marriage is a legally recognised union between two individuals, be these heterosexuals, or a same-sex couple. A wedding is simply a way of declaring that love to each other as well as to your family, friends, and society at large.

That said, all weddings differ, based on the likes and dislikes of the individuals involved and the vision you have for your wedding day. Whether you choose to get married by the seaside, in a shark tank, or have a 1930’s theme, the uniqueness and imagination of your wedding day come down to your personality and preferences.  It has nothing to do with your gender preferences or sexuality.

So you want to get married – where can you have same-sex marriage?

The answer should be anywhere. After all, marriages between same-sex couples have been legal within the UK since 2014. At the time of writing, 1 in 35 weddings was between same-sex couples. This number is only set to rise further over the coming years.

Yet, whilst the number of same-sex couples wanting to marry is growing, the options of places to get married remains stubbornly low. At the time of writing, only 200 places of worship had opted to carry out same-sex marriages compared to the 40,000 that conduct heterosexual weddings. So choosing to have a religious ceremony may be problematic!

You may find getting married at a wedding venue may be a more favourable option, and for the most part, wedding venues and providers who will meet most of your wedding needs will also treat LGBTQ+ couples in a welcoming way.

However, there are always extremes in any society. Even though it is illegal to discriminate on the grounds of sexuality, you may still find some businesses that are either unaware of their legal responsibility or prefer to ignore the issue entirely. I have even heard of some suppliers trying to charge more for their services due to a wedding being a same-sex wedding.  The general rule of thumb must therefore be to do your homework with care and look to others for recommendations for LGTBQ+ friendly suppliers.

Gay wedding

So do you have to follow stereotypical gender roles at my wedding?

The wedding industry has a wealth of stereotypical gender roles. In a heterosexual wedding, bridal prep always seems to have more importance, certainly within my area of photography, than groom prep. But why does one area appear to have more weight than another? Are both partners not equally as important as the other? These specific gender roles are fostered and perpetuated through years of tradition. The wedding dress, the bride walking down the aisle, the bridal bouquet all help to reinforce the narrative, etc.

But it is not just tradition that reinforces these ideas, but also the language that is used; e.g. bridesmaids and groomsmen could instead be described as the wedding party, yet regrettably, they are not.  Both the traditions, stereotypical gender roles, and language of a wedding appear to exclude the LGBTQ+ community in favour of the heterosexual community.

I know you’re going to shout at me now, “but they should be thinking about it!”, and I agree they should.

But I think that don’t think about it because they know no other way. In other words, in their immediate worlds that surround them, the issues of the LGBTQ+ community have not directly affected them and therefore they do not feel the desire to make a change. Now I am not trying to justify their actions. Let me try to explain this from a different angle, as I think I can put this best by reflecting on my experiences as a mother of a disabled young woman. Had my daughter not had a disability, I would probably not have been drawn into the disability world and the constant fight that I take on, to ensure that not only does she get what she needs but also that she is accepted and recognised by society. It’s a hard fight, believe me. Ultimately, I believe that in cases of both LGBTQ+ gender, disability, and race it comes down to a lack of education. To become a truly inclusive society, we must change both our use of language and our expectations of what is considered to be the norm. As I mentioned before, weddings are about individuals and your wants and dreams for your wedding day, so if both partners want to carry flowers, why not? If both want to walk down the aisle or wear the same outfits, why not? It’s your wedding and you have a right, as we all do, to have your wedding the way you want.

There may be issues and differences in your wedding but there are in every wedding, that’s what makes all weddings unique. Your wedding will not be unique because you are a same-sex couple, it will be unique because you are you. A couple in love, surrounded by friends and family who love you unconditionally and personally: I can’t think of anything more special than that!

My Philosophy;

“To provide excellence by placing YOU, your dreams, your wants, your needs, in the heart of everything I do”.

“To create beautifully, naturally, authentic, fun, romantic heirloom photography, that YOU are guaranteed to love and that will be cherished by future generations to come”.

“To provide YOU with a truly exceptional service through following my core beliefs of honesty, fairness, integrity, determination and creativity.”

I have been helping couples plan their weddings in the stunning natural landscape of the Devon countryside, rugged moorland of Dartmoor and spectacular seascape of the coastline of Devon, Somerset, and Cornwall for years and I’m using that experience and relationship with a great network of wedding vendors to help you plan your special wedding day.

Why not take a look my gallery to see other examples of my work & check out my packages and availability for your wedding day.